"Fake...You can't fit a horse into a cannon"

Some games are so bad that they're not worth playing. Some are so bad they almost need to be played. Zoo Race is one of those games. You've probably not heard of this before so I'll explain what I know. Zoo Race is a third-person racing game with what appears to be religious themes. You race as a woman named Hannah... who gets turned into a horse. So does everyone else in the library.

The opening cutscene is pretty funny but gameplay starts about 4 minutes in and chaos ensues:


Hannah seems fairly casual about getting turned into a farmyard animal.

Yes, this is in fact a legitimate game. Everything about the video reeks of bad design. The controls look sluggish, the game is hideous and I bet the overly terribly scripted cutscenes are mandatory too. Strangely enough, I still feel compelled to give Zoo Race a play. The mixture of booming voice acting, dodgy animation, repetitive tunes and horse-propelling cannons creates something that can almost be described as awesome. If it's free, I might give Zoo Race a go and possibly even write another article, as much as that pains me to say.

This could be the start of something very strange.